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Monday, June 27, 2005

27 June 2005: WTF is HR

it's heartrate!!!

okay i'll admit it - i went back to the gym. I'm back 3 times a week - 40 minutes of cardio plus 3 sets of 10 on 5-6 machines depending on what muscle group i'm working. I don't like it, but it's a necessary evil. bleh bleh bleh. I wanna just lay down and read or watch foreign films, or lay in the pool, or anything. Unfortunately even though i DesPIIIISE working out - I'm actually pretty good at it. Fuck that though. So many weirdos at the gym...of course there are those dudes that lift coz they wanna look the part and pick up chicks, I give myself about 3 months before I can outlift those little he-bitches. They are fuckin funny for that coz I have naturally strong muscle bellies with good length. Hahaha It's gonna shrivel their little nuts when they figure out the Filipina girl with a POKER face can outlift them. I also love the fuckin Assclowns who go to the gym and don't even work out, chests all caved in, just sitting on machines reading a newspaper. Fuckin WEAK...if you don't wanna be at home with your wife, at least have the sense in your head to go to a tittie bar - shieeeeeeet. Then there are the weird escapees of the 80's. Women in their 40's who have a little petite 80's chick from a girlband trapped in their body, who walk out the dressing room at about 250+ Lbs wearing a USA baby tee, blue and white booty shorts and some read tights with original nike's from back in the day. Wow did they really have to use that thigh machine in FRONT of me.

bwaaa hahahaha.

Like i said = I'll keep my fuckin Poker Face.

Monday, June 13, 2005

13 Jun 2005: General Ongoings

Truth in Advertising...

A girl walked into the shop today and her tee said,"tell your boyfriend thanks..." I like that hoe - she's honest and straightforward - she's sayin' i'm a slut. If she had a warning label like cigarrettes - hers wouldn't say may cause cancer - her's would say -- may fuck your man. Thanks for the warning and thanks for the sincerity...

Bewildered Man in Tag Heuer...

I'm a pastry chef at a gelateria. Check this out they have a panic button - it's a little doorbell under the counter so when they are slammed everyone at the back of the house runs to the front of the house. One night people were literally spilling onto the sidewalk and I went up there to help. This was like 2 nights ago. So I got a gelato for him and another for his wife, then he came to the counter --- I was just bein' pleasant and smiling coz it is really fun and crazy up there and I love bein' around the kiddos. He just stared at me for a long minute and i said is everything cool? He's like you just have such a BEAUTIFUL face...I laughed and said thanks. He said no really you're beautiful with a respectful awe and surprise. I laughed. Tommy said, I thought he said we have a beautiful place. I said har har you fartknocker. The man was bewildered I think coz I fall into the 'ethnic' category. Clearly he'd been married to his blonde haired blue eyed wife forever - and found it strange to notice a non waspy beauty. Funny and flattering.

Personally, I think it's coz my face is symmetrical that people are drawn to it. A plastic surgeon cat told me that once. That I'm very beautiful and lucky to have such a symmetrical face. I didn't believe the mothuhfucka so i photoshopped two left sides of my face and two right sides - the right side is just rounder and more friendly. But he wasn't lying - my face matches. If any of you have time - do that shit, it's weird - put together two sides of your face together reversing one. it's entertaining.

Nothing Tastes Good...

Not even my iced espressos, or my double leaf oolong teas, or fresh salads or noodle bowls. I dunno what I want. Stay tuned. nuSun told me to go get a pee pee test, he thinks baby Saucy is on the way. I don't think so - I think I need to fast for a week on clear liquid

Hip Squares

If i hear ONE more phony ass club kid tryin' to wax poetic about shit. I'm gonna get mad. Not everyone is a POET. And just because you chanced upon a clever grouping of words ONCE, does not give you a poetic soul. Don't wield your thesaurus and cheap ass shoes and lousy haircut like you came from the nerdcake awards. True Poetry is born of pain and a pit of despair filled misunderstanding. In the darkest solitude often blooms the dopest poetry. It doesn't sit alongside spin spin sugar and your double polo wearing ass. Just put on more of that lipgloss and go vomit somewhere coz you won't make your money in a literary fashion.

Knowledge isn't what you memorize, it's what you verbalize after digesting the knowledge. Please stop memorizing Lines and parroting them - coz you're playin' yourself - intellectual masturbation is utterly OUT.

The Look...

Amazingly enough. I still catch nuSun looking at me like the first time he met me. He still looks at me like I'm the yummiest thing he ever saw. It cracks me up and I feel so lucky.

I've caught a few men staring into the kitchen to look at me..and I turn around and bust them and they get the most charming embarrassed grins. I'm glad. Is it possible that grown men blush.

Okay Mom...

okay mom is out of control -- every time she comes over she acts like we don't buy food...then she tells me Ayyy why are you so skinny, why don't you guys eat...why is there no food. Then she goes to the white people grocery store, then the asian grocery store, then costco, then the mexican carniceria - and my refrigerator is bursting like anna nicole smith in 2002...Sometimes I just want my double oolong tea and I can't find it in the Stainless Steel beast, so i give up and just have a water. I totally don't understand this - we did not grow up poor or starving or any of that. We don't live near any family really - so it's not like I'll cook a random feast coz my cousins came over (but I do miss cooking in heaps for family)...I tried to explain to mom that due to the heat food doesn't keep as long, so I buy produce every couple days and staples about every 2 weeks, but you know she's deaf to my bullshit - coz she's doin her job and she's bein' mom. I'll have to make requests so the food gets used yanno...

Fawkin' Delete

If one more of my friends deletes their account coz of hater hoes, online drama, hate mail, or false chicks advertising as something else...I'm gonna start throwing creme pies at faces. bleh...

Life is the Same and Life is Different.

Simple Joys are the best it seems.