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Sunday, June 22, 2008

22 Jun 2008: Treats and Truths...


I got myself a treat. The Betsey Johnsons in Green with the matching pants. Coz I deserve it and nice shoes just have a certain fit.


This morning Katie and I carpooled to work. She came a little early so I made chicken and sausage bomblettes with bellpepper and green onion and we had some of the coffee from my godmother's land. She was telling me that she was watching this 30 day show with dude from Supersize me and apparently now he puts people in situations for 30 days. One of them was an avid hunter being placed with some PETA folks.

So we are sitting there having breakfast and I hear Julians alarm and I walk in there and say Katie is here so don't walk around with your sausage out. Hahahha. He says Good Morning Girls and gets in the shower...

We continue our conversation:

Katie: So the animal chick says animals are more important than people. And the hunter dude asks,"so you would save the animal first" The chick says," Well, they are family wouldn't you?" Hunter dude says,"I would save your life first in front of an animals." Chick says,"But a pet is like family." Hunter dude says,"I would still save a human first." Chick shakes head.

Me: That's the funniest shit I've heard all week

Katie: Well, wouldn't you save a person first...

Me: Well...if I had to save my sisters dogs or my ex...I would save the dogs.

Katie: Bwaa hahahaa why?

Me: Because the dogs understand loyalty.

Katie: I guess if you have to choose between a maggot and a dog - the dog is higher on the food chain. Hahahahhha.

That's the truth.


More Truth.

If you tell all your friends that you are leaving your man/woman because they cheated on you. Then get in all your friends ears telling them that you are gonna start over and blah blah. Then a couple weeks later take them back. Expect NO sympathy from me because you just stopped being a victim, you are now a VOLUNTEER.


A little more truth

As much as I meditate and pray to have more sympathy/empathy for others I find that it is becoming impossible. If you are doing the same thing that you have been doing for the last 1/3/5/7 years and still cryin' about it - I'm just gonna play deaf on your ass and hopefully bite my tongue. Be warned - I may NOT be able to bite my tongue. If the same shit is happening to you over and over then YOU are the common denominator - work it out.

People are getting sideswiped left and right by my venomous tongue.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

05 Jun 2008: So You Want It and You Wanna Eat It...

Some bitches...

Some "bitches" want their cake and to eat it too.

The other night Julian came home from playin' some tournament poker. He does this 2 or 3 times a week. He mentioned that our friend V** had been out of town in Michigan visiting his parents. I was like oh nice. So he mentioned that V** so called girlfriend approached Julian and started chatting him up. Well, she mentioned that his mother didn't seem to like her very much and felt that she should be doing "more." Bwaa hahhaha

He asked,"like what?" She said I guess like cooking and stuff around the house. And Julian just kept listening and she went on and felt that she didn't feel that she should have to do anything more than be his "girlfriend." I laughed and laughed and laughed. And Julian said what. I said well before I go off - does the non participatory hoe work? He said yes. I said okay so they split the bills down the middle and he said yes, but so do we. I said okay. I said, "she's a lazy bitch." He laughed and said you are right. So in that nice way that Julian and his Family are he said,"...perhaps you could look at this as a learning opportunity. Maybe you could learn to make V** favourites from his Mom." She basically said NO and she had no desire to do that.

THEN...she asked where is your girl, she never comes to the bar. Julian said she doesn't like bars and when she shows up places it's only to make an appearance, but my girl is doing her own THING. So then the dumb heffa presses him and he says she's either cooking or writing or painting. And the girl got this overtly dramatic move to her neck and hand and said,"Oh Hell no...I'm just not that kind of girl" Julian said,"she isn't home barefoot and cooking. She is a chef for a living and she loves to cook and I'm not gonna stop her from doing whatever she wants to do. BUT, what she does is the bomb - so lucky me." This dumb nutgarglin' hoe looked baffled. Julian said,"Look men and women are naturally good at different things...She is good at cooking and I'm not so I pay for the groceries and carry them in the house. She washes the dishes and I put them away. She does the laundry and I put that away. She organizes the house and I clean the bathrooms and shampoo the carpets. She tracks the expenses, I give her the money and she pays bills online and sends me confirmations. The girl was like Why? He said,"because this way we are pushing together instead of pulling apart..."

Of course she didn't get it and stood her ground and actually tried to magnify some moot point that she does try to cook but he would rather eat at the bar. Maybe because you don't cook in LOVE bitch. Just coz you like that shit doesn't mean it's good enough for consumption...That's WHY your Muh'fucka cheats on your ass (and I've seen it happen). That's WHY you get treated like a roommate instead of a girlfriend. That's WHY it's 4am and you don't know where that man is. That's WHY he doesn't really give a rats ass about what you do coz he does his own shit. That's WHY he doesn't care about the home you share because it isn't one. So before your slovenly ass bags any woman who COOKS check yourself. You ain't even a penny in a dimepiece world.

Mind you...a lot of my best girls don't cook - but they hustle and they never knock anyone who DOES cook. And I cook for them as willingly as I do for Julian. So I'm not knockin' the fact that she doesn't cook I'm knockin' the fact that she's knockin' someone who does. I gots. I gots my own house, own car, own what I want when I want to and on a level that you will never aspire to domestically much less internationally. You are a thorn in that man's side and all you are doing is payin' half the rent IF that.

She's lucky V** even introduced her to his mother coz clearly she ain't even wifey material. I told Julian - I have an A with my mother in law and you have an A+ with your mother in law and all we have to do is maintain our A's. It is far better to start off with an A than it is to start with a D. City Momma has talked to Julian about how she can't wait to have Grandbebe's...and Country Momma has talked to me about how she can't wait to have Grandbebe's. I told him my mother has never talked about that in excitement EVER EVER EVER. He said neither has his. I told him do you know what an honor that is? He said YES! I said because your Momma trusts me with the upbringing of the Grandbebe's as my Momma trusts you also. That says a lot for who we are separately and who we are together.

We are lucky - to have the maternal blessings. Of course his Pops is always sayin' how he loves his daughter in law and where is that GELATO. hahahha.


So take it how you want it.

We preserve our home on a certain level because we are building a life. We both understand that we do NOT get something for nothing and V**'s bitch like so many around expect everything for nothing. Don't ask for something you do not have...if you ain't got it then you have no right to expect it. These bitties feel they can sit on that big doughy ass and get the world just for existing. Reality Check HOE - never in the history of PIMPDOM does a hoe get something for nothing. So get under that streetlight before I unravel this hanger and teach yo' ass.