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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

27 Aug 2008: Designer Imposter - erm Saucy Imposters

You heffa's get on my nerves and you know who the SHIT you are.

Designer Imposters...

You know what gets on my nerves...designer imposters...get your own hairstyle, get your own STEEZ, get your own individual style boyfriend and get off my nuts...coz while I smell like ISSEY just smell of dollar store imposter. Bleh on YOU. Imitation is not a form of flattery - kiss my entire brown ass with that shit. I mean seriously is this really necessary - it peeves me to no end.

I don't need a body double - I do my own stunts.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

24 Aug 2008: Stuff to do at Ikea with your Chef Buddies...

So when your chef BFF Kae blows in from out of town...and your other chef BFF is available...

Have some Gelato together

note: I dunno why my skin is glowing like that...all i use is cetaphil and philosophy moisturizer for all skin types??? After I saw these pics I told Julian it looks like someone rubbed all kinds of crisco over my face!

Get some errands out of the way and then hump over to Ikea for some meatballs and olalliberry iced tea and later some dark swedish style coffee...

Try on some toilets and see if the seat fits.

Let the baby take your picture for posterity

Jock the children's bathing attire and try it on for size...while newly found golf towels for Julian...

Bwaa hahahhaha - I walked up to BFF Kae and said Mommy mommy can I have this please!!! She started laughin' her ass off. This man was standing to the side and looked bored waiting for his wife and he started to laugh his ass off and said,"that looks great on you..." I'm still crackin up that I put on a hooded bathrobe for a toddler...Bwa hahahahha

Have a nice day!

24 Aug 2008: Medication...not for YOU!! Haha.

Medication...not for YOU!

Well I started my new job a couple weeks ago doin this IT type thing...definitely not as hard as what i used to do and definitely acceptable in terms of stress, environment and co-workers...Well, I also work with my sister. So I told her before I started that we were not going to eat out everyday coz that is a bad habit. So my first day we went out for pizza and salad at a local joint downtown. The second day I brought garden salad with roasted chicken and all this stuff...well...

I guess my sister has had her lunch STOLEN out of the lunchroom fridge - there are 2 refrigerators. So I bring the lunch in a brown bag and my crazy sister writes on the bag and puts it in the fridge!

It went like this...

And there is our playcousin laughin with us over the bag...

Bwaa hahahhaa.

Day 2 she wrote: Stool Samples - must be refrigerated.

Day 3 she wrote: Dog Anal Glands - for analysis.

Bwaa hahahah

The next few days after that I just brought a plastic bag from Paris Vegas and stapled it up. The funny thing is...this is nowhere near a ghetto place to is full of people who can damn well buy their own lunch as well as mine. It's just hilarious that people steal lunches --- who steals lunch? First of all, I'm just not stealing shit. Second of all, eating a strangers food is like playing food poisoning/hepatits/cooties roulette: which means - I don't eat other people's food who I don't know - coz generally people are nasty - they don't wash their hands - they scratch all kinds of body parts - keep dirty kitchens and then cook in that filth - HELL NO.

Needless to the last 8x I've brought lunch, they haven't been stolen.


Addendum. I pack our lunches and Julian's lunches is funny how people say wow fantastic...what a gourmet lunch. People at Julians work always ask - did you eat your gourmet lunch yet? wow can i have some? dang you always eat so healthy! and so forth and so on...Hahahahha.

I'll say it now and I say it all the time - eating food made from your own hands while sitting at a table with friends is a dying civilized behaviour. I am glad I can afford the luxury of sitting with family for lunch and a loved one for dinner.


Sunday, August 17, 2008

17 Aug 2008: My Second Vegas Wedding...

Julian's cousin James has been living in Las Vegas and married Dolores. We were invited. It was a bit stressful the entire week before because we pretty much worked straight through...We were departing on the 8th and Gya was off to NYC on the 11th. Wendy, Gya and I coordinated a small impromptu bomblettes the night before my departure...However, there was a sudden rain and lightning and it knocked out my quadrant. So basically no electricity from 830pm until 230am. Bwaa hahhaa

I sent the girls a text message and told them I was kickin' it by candlelight. They said ohhhh - we'll come kick it with you. So they came and sat with me by candlelight...I was hot - and frustrated and exhausted...and somehow managed to get the packing of our clothes started...

We sat over gelato and laughed and chopped it up and stuff...We must have been talkin' over an hour and then we heard Julian give a nice roaring snore. The girls said, "ohhhh Kibbs is here?" I laughed and said he's BEEN here - carry on, he can't hear us - listen to him in there!" Oh my girls were all dolled up to go to the Blunt Club even with the Hawaiian bread in tow for the cancelled bomblettes...Julian says,"Why don't you go out with your girls?" Me."because we have to be up at 4am and catch a 6am flight to Vegas..." Hahahhaa.

I woke Julian up so he could say goodbye to Gya! Because the night before he said - I'm sad. I asked Why? He said because your girl is moving away and your peoples are cool! I laughed and said don't worry we'll visit her many many times before she comes to kick it for the wedding!

As always...the 3 I love.


So we woke up ridiculously early. Got ready and Jereme took us to the airport. We caught the flight just fine and had a snack in the airport at the bud lounge and just waited for City Momma to arrive...

City Momma is so cute...the first thing she said was Awwwww you two look wonderful!!! I pointed out how much weight and mass Julian is getting and she stopped to take a really good look at him and said oh you HAVE put on some weight...and she turned to me and said,"Thank you Saucy for taking such good care of my Baby!!!" Awwww.

We picked up the rental and then checked in switched rooms and then ran over to see Uncle RC and Auntie Eiko. Well...while we switched rooms these 2 guys were like oh are you ladies checkin' out - we're just checkin' in. We laughed and Momma said something funny like yup we're outta here. So the dude grabs my arm and is tryin' to holla. I laughed and said in my little girl voice,"Momma the man is touching my wrist..." He dropped my wrist like a hot potato as Momma turned around. Bwaa hahahhha. His friend looked at him and said,"Wuuuut PLAYA" Bwaa hahahhaha. Then City Momma and I grabbed a sandwich at the cafe downstairs. Meanwhile Julian played some poker downstairs at Mandalay Bay. I have to admit...I love hangin' out with family in Vegas more than I like the gamblin' or the drinkin' or any of that. Before we knew it - it was time to coordinate ourselves for the wedding...James and Dolores were going to get married at around 8-ish.

Of course we were on time coz City Momma was on time...Uncle RC and Auntie Eiko were on time...and the Auntie who should have been on time was not on time was not. So...we killed the time taking pics...City Momma has more pics and I will attach those accordingly once I receive them.

Here are some of the pics:

Uncle RC and Auntie Eiko with Julian...

I love the pic below because almost everyone is smiling!

Here is a cropped version of one of my favourite pics...that is Julian's cousin Kevin and his son Little Kevin. Little Kevin is so cute...he asked me,"When are you and Uncle Julian getting married..." I laughed and laughed and said,"Well Hunny it's not a woman's job to ask..." He smiled and walked over to Julian and said,"When are you and Saucy getting married..." Bwaa hahahahhha.

Kevin' and Kibby

Me with the Men...

City Momma with the Men


I love to see Julians face looking a little more full...I told him you are Papasan status now with that chubb to your jowl!!! hahahha.

I will post pics from the reception later.


We spent the next day just doin' some general sightseeing...because City Momma had never been to Las Vegas before...

We let Julian drive as much as possible.

You know we kick it with Buddha for blessings and luck...and to remember that even though we are all born suffering there is humor in all that happens...

Metal Bonsai...what a fabulous idea...I'm going to make sure to have a wood one made for our vacation house!

Don't jock my Bruce Lee Stunna Shades

Everyone talked so much hot shit about how the chocolate fountain at Bellagio was the bomb and this shit and that shit...BLEH - it was AIIGHT. I was not impressed - nor was I impressed by the flavor of their There.

My chocolate is far more stunning than Bellagio's chocolate:

So then we were just in time for the water show...and Momma has got it on video!!! We have funny video of each other learning to use video...

So...we decided to walk back to the Mandalay Bay after being on the Bellagio side...and Julian sees this statue and says,"...PICTURE TIME..." Bwaa hahahha. He jumped up on that platform thing and started feelin' the thing up right by the sidewalk escalator...I busted out my camera and laughingly told him,'go ahead and feel her up coz those are the ONLY white titties your ass will be feeling on...believe THAT!" This older white man started CRACKINNNN UP! Actually sometimes I crack MYSELF up.

So then we went back to the take a nap because we had passes to the bank Club in the Bellagio. Julian wanted to go out to the Hooters Hotel (w/c he later reported as lame)...then we met in the lobby for a drink while some people karaoke'd. City Momma was knocked out for the count and I didn't have the heart to wake her up. We were sittin' around choppin' it up with some locals and not so local friendly folks...

Funny...once we put our heads down - it was lights out.

Next thing I knew it was morning...Momma and I went to catch a breakfast buffet and chop it up before I flights later in the afternoon...It was great to sit down and have breakfast...the omelette cook was mortified when he accidentally splattered momma with a little egg and oil...but it was okay. I love love love love breakfast...Then we went up and Julian had some croissant with cream cheese and fruit while we packed up.

Sooner than soon it was time to go...Everyone was pretty exhausted from the reception and the walkin' around and the cocktails here and there in the sun...

We said our goodbyes at the airport...and I'm sure it will be a short amount of time before we see City Momma again!

ps) I caught the bouquet...that is --- I caught it after he asked the bride to precision pass it specifically to me and all the bridesmaids blocked any takers.

Bwaa hahahha. and right as I caught it everyone turned to look at Julian and he had a big ole smile on his face. Uncle RC said,"I really don't like comin' out to the dessert but we WILL come to Arizona when the two of you get married..." Julian laughed and laughed and smiled and put a wedding bell on his suit button...Auntie Eiko laughed and whispered a prayer into it and hung it on his ear! Hahahahhahha.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

16 Aug 2008: Random Change & Kindness...

Random Kindness...

About a month ago Judi contacted me indicating that she wanted to get a birthday cake for her best friend Carinae...and could I make a birthday cake for her and of course she insisted on payment. Of course I declined payment and made the cake which would only be for 2-3 people. Now that's love...2 best friends 1 in the Bay Area and the other in the Southwest but still one determined to do something for the other. How could anyone decline?

Carinae came by the shop and she was warm and cute and happy and it was just like choppin' it up with an old friend...


Random Change 1...

I gave my 2 week notice weeks ago at my previous job for a job which pays much better and has extremely good benefits. I will also be working bankers hours M-F 8-5. Hahahhaa. Truth be told I started a week ago. Even more true is that they wanted me to start 2 weeks ago, but that was not a go because Julian and I had an appearance to make in Vegas.

I worked right up until my departure for Vegas. But that will be in a later blog with our Vegas story.


Random Kindness 2

{observe that just add water shit in the back...that was a recent change only shortly before my resignation...go figure...coz i'm against boxed joints}

So on my last day of work the girls pulled together a little potluck...this tasty cheesy rice...pork loin with gravy...a garden salad with craisins, croutons and almonds, these crazy mashed potatoes, and they brought in a leche flan cake with a chocolate bottom. You know they didn't have to. They didn't have to get the card or the flowers either...but they did. I'm gonna miss the girls but not much else...hahahha.

People have asked me why I went back to IT instead of getting another job in the pastry game. First of all, the valley has no pastry jobs of any meter at all; it is the off season right now and I know far too many unemployed people. Second of all even if I did find a job worth my time the benefits would still take a year to kick in. Thirdly, I find people in the restaurant to have a mismatched ego vs I've seen plenty of "ig'nant" behaviour in my time...but Ig'nant like you really didn't do that did professional courtesy as an end result vs. day to day work tedium shit.

But that's okay...because no matter what you do you can never deny your background and the shit that trails behind you. It's hilarious to see that no matter what face people show you they can never hide the face underneath. I love to see people struggle and struggle and struggle...


Random Change 2

About a month girl Gya sends me a text message so that I'm one of the first to know that she is about to bail for Brooklyn. Yes ladies and gentleman...I was sad then happy then excited then sad again at the news. But the positioning of a fabulous job, a plethora of opportunities and the fact that she loves the city - well it's a go. Fortunately for me she has a ton of family here and will always be home to visit. Even more fortunate for me is the fact that we will have Brooklyn Bomblettes Soon.

I'mma miss our l'il tetra pack!

i'll be spinderella okay?

I love you G-Girl! And I hope to see you soon!