16 Dec 2006: How...

When you are parched and given a choice of what should touch your lips... How would you choose... Which would you choose... A cool glass of water --- glistening in the sun... A hot cup of coffee --- still, dark and tempting... A sultry sweet scented fruit --- ripened in far away places... Would you choose? Or take all three? Such choices should not be left to me...

09 Feb 2006: when...

when...

...When I fall off the see saw

would you run and help me up

would you brush the sand out

of my socks and mary janes feet...

...When I stumble

over grassy paths and high school math

would you pull your desk closer

and say i'll help you through...

...When I choke down 28 units of learning

would you force me to watch bad movies

and fall asleep against your chest out of

sheer exhaustion. Then when my breath

slowed to even pattern, would you whisper

I love you but I can never say...

...When I get lost around the world

walking in the dark through unknown places

refusing maps, helpful suggestions and

partaking of meals from many other mothers.

Would you be there at the airport, your grin

still shy from many months or years apart...

...When I cripple my soul and cage myself

with corporate work and bills and mortgages

with the demands of impending adulthood

would you remind me of LSD stars in the sky...

...When I speak in tongues

be that language foreign, filipino or fashionable

would you calmly wait for english...

..When the table is set for Family Favourites

would you have the cultural sense

not to POINT and ask...

...When I free myself

would you leave me to heal for a moment...

...When I celebrate

because I finally found a way to do what

I was mean to do by trudging another

educational and crafty path

would you raise your glass...

...When LIFE is so crazy

and bonkers and nuts, because

people like me need 28 hours in a day.

would you let me blurr past you...

...When I weave a cocoon

because I am smothered by

every day normalities

would you patiently wait...

...When I don't understand for a moment

would you be my translator...

...When my strength deteriorates

because I've lived long enough and strong enough

would you put your withered hand in mine...

...When it's time

would you...

08 Nov 2005: i could...

I could...

I could fall in love with you

but you would just consume me

I could drown in ur eyes

but you would sever my every limb

I could write until Buddha stopped me

but you would say why did you stop at all

I could look you in that face i've known since before times

but you are determined to break me

I could smolder in your presence

but what could come of that - just death

I could die in front of you

but you'd mock me in that dying weakness

I could put it all out there

but you'd sway that bay swagger

and tell me

you're soft 'ma

and my heart would dwindle

to a wisp of smoke

as i exhaled.

Each time i genuflected emotionallly

you poked and prodded me verbally

don't say i'm sensitiva

coz when a wild uncaged animal presents its gut

it's to be petted, not to be shoved away

Perhaps this is the lesson of this lifetime

Perhaps we should get our shit together

because we still speak a different language

as eras go by

I could change the worlds as we know it

but you'd never really understand

would you.