13 Feb 2007: On Valentines Eve...

Love in all it's manifestations...will always be heard and felt and known...

...on Family Love...

My family has always loved me even if they have never understood me completely. It wasn't always easy to love someone who's love affair was with the eccentric, the odd, the artistic and sometimes the strange. What they did know completely is that they believed that I would do what I needed to do and if I fell from attempting anything they were always there to renew my strength and smiles. What they did always show me was faith and belief that I am somebody. What they always expressed that I would always BE somebody.

And now I am.

...on Friends Love...

My Batches and my Boys...never discouraged but always encouraged. Some of them for only decades and some of them for only months. But the Love has always been immeasurable. Their presence isn't compared to bein in my heart but moreso as being a part of my spine. When people love you and metamorphosize from friends into a family of your own they are bonded to you. I love you all exponentially...

...on Career Love...

Finally, I am doing something I love. It was a long journey to switch from an IT gig to a creative gig but I regret none of it. Because of the love I've shown my work it is now loving me back. It is evident with how busy I've become.

...on Food Love...

Shaking heads, stuffed mouths followed by smiles and wordless mumbling, the scent of anything calling children from downstairs, anticipation of meals to be partaken and all the motions and emotions surrounding it - it's the other love I carry around me. Where before I cooked out of ethnic training and habit - now I cook out of genuine enjoyment and love. This is going to leak into all parts of my life...I feed you all coz I love you and not because I "should."

...on Self Love...

In the days prior to living poetically, I would "lose" myself in helping another. Now I am myself all the time and am never asked to be anyone else but ME all the time. Even that shmarmy smartass chick, or the demanding hello kitty lovin' girl, or the badass female with a stroll that could kill. Now I am just me and who could ask for anything more. I love myself without conceit - only with a desire to improve myself and the positive uptempo...

...on Romantic Love...

How could I resist?

When I first met Julian I shook him (I tried to shake him) off because I was a dating monster. I would walk out on dates if anything big or small displeased me and the feelings of whomever took me was irrelevant. He never did take that behaviour off of me and would laugh and say,"Quit playin' girl, come sit near me..." Ironically, he only invites me close to enjoy my verve. Everything we do is an adventure to him, a date, a walk, a talk, reading books side by side, shopping, eating out or cooking meals together. The amount of time we have been "together" is far surpassed by the communion we have together. How could you resist anyone who stops everything to dance with you. How could you resist anyone who doesn't fear potential anger. How could you resist anyone who laughs in the face of danger. How could you resist anyone who coated the hook he caught you with --- well, wiith sugar. How could you resist anyone who actively thanks higher powers for what you have together and what you have apart. How could you resist anyone who rises and sleeps with a smile on his face. How could you resist anyone who finds you beautiful even when you are asleep. How could you resist anyone who eggs you on to amplify your abilities while bringing his own.

As Suga Free says,"Don't no woman want no man who will roll over for her."

The other night we realized at a party that we knew each other by 2 degrees of separation. That even if we hadn't met at the Talib Kweli gig, it was only a matter of time before we met. Whoa.

What we got makes your stomach drop and your mind explode.

...on tomorrow...

So enjoy tomorrow everyone. In any way and everyway...because you may think otherwise but there is some kind of love in your life - and THAT should be celebrated. When you are doing what you are supposed to do and doing it with everything you've got - ultimately the rest of your life will follow.

---

"If I ask you questions the questions are to answer doubts I needed to let go. It is not to question the perfection in which we live."

--- Saucerina

06 Dec 2004: Entry 143

E N T R Y 143

How befitting is this...that once allowed to pick any holiday at all I would pick valentines and ahhh ohhh don't blame a girl who's heart bleeds chocolate. bwaaa hahaha

bogey and bacall

I named it thus because it is a miniature chocolate torte topped with fresh berries and the most exquisite smattering of powdered sugar - bittersweet but a perfect pair. Clearly this was chefs favourite. Yes that's a love cookie don't hate. haha

heart puffs filled with diplomat cream. Diplomat cream is awesome, I love it - it's airy and friendly to the palate it doesn't lollagag around your throat the way pastry cream does. Most people like pastry cream better coz it's more rich - more custard...I like the hint of custard more than anything else. So yah this is a heart on a heart with cream and then a slivered berry on it. It's leaning towards sickeningly kyoote - but I like the flavour of this.

towering hearts filled with cream

This job is my favourite - staggered heart cut outs from puff pastry...crunch yet the center is filled with a light diplomat cream that you can dip the hearts in. yet on the side I put a chocolate touch...2 bebe hearts bleeding with chocolate...chef said this was heavy - but this was the crowd pleaser - especially topped with that 10 inch piece of sugar i made. A lot of folks who saw this little tower really dug it..in a real restaurant setting I would probably make it 3 high with 1 bleeding heart, but for school i maxed it.

N.... loved eating this monster, he's like oh bae this is yum *insert nodding and grinning and chewing and digging in pastry box for more!!!*...he gave me the most sincere look and said you haven't failed me yet and I know you never will. LMFAO...

Apple Towers

This is just a basic piece to show off macadamia nuts dipped in caramel. I made a phyllo apple/pear streudel cut it bias on a few pieces and then set them up like towers - positioned 3 macadamias with sugar strands. and then placed creme anglaise and a streudel white wine sauce i made. After removing the apple and pear from the sauce - i added about 8 oz of white wine to the sauce and reduced it. Once it reduced I threw in a handful of sugar and stirred until it was plating consistency. That was the yummiest part of this dish. Phyllo streudel just reminds me of lumpia on steroids. hahaha. N..... ate this thing like he hadn't eaten in days - well he had been at the club and don't get me started on the chocolate pockets I made. Hhahaha he ate those like an ethiopian in the back of a red cross truck. bwaaa hahaha.

I have one last set of plate photos coming and then i'm onto making candy and wedding cakes. All that jazz and all that good stuff. bwaaa hahaha - money makers that's what they are about. only 6 more school weeks and then I am done and stuff. I'm sniffing around for externships. Imagine that. It's gone by so quick - I only wish that I could take some more bread classes. It seemed that segment went by hella quick and Chef G hella made me hate bread...I also have sugar pulling and chocolate design left. exciting but nerve wracking...bleh.

Meanwhile I lucked out and I'm surrounded by some real true type friends and a fella that loves me like baNOODLES...can life be any better...blessings rain on us despite our challenges yanno!!!