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Tuesday, October 12, 2004

12 Oct 2004: Gateau St. Honore

Aiiiish...Gateau Gateau Gateau

Pretty isn't it. well you know what it aint nuthing but caramel lego-ed cream puffs with a puff pastry base. Whip Cream mixed with freakin pastry cream and some sugar nests. but it does taste good...hella good...It's funny. It is a french desert done two ways - the american way and the french way. Either way it tastes good so who cares. This is the funny thing about gateau st honore...done the french way the icing should be pastry cream whipped with meringue..that's raw egg whites for those of you who aren't quite in the know. yah yah it's raw so what. Personally I don't really give a shit if it's raw. I mean the first Caesar Salad I ever had they used to make the dressing at the table and I would always say more egg more garlic..i knew i was eating raw shit...but apparently in this more and more homogenized world we live in -- everyone wants there shit pasteurized and sanitized. Where is the fucking FUN in that. no risk no rush.

Eggs come out the shell. Did y'all know that shit. You can buy a carton of egg whites or a carton of egg yolks PASTEURIZED. you can buy egg whites by the bucket, or egg yolks or a mixed ratio for a higher price. I'm so confused by that. Part of the romance for me in cooking is touching everything I use (despite my vicious allergies to bread flour)...even though i hate the scent of refined sugar I still love to use it...touch it...know the differences in texture. pasteurized egg. Phtoooey I say.

Everyone wants everything so clean, so sanitized, so unavoidably dangerous. But everything is dangerous. I've had mild food poisoning countless times. I can feel it - a dangerous head throbbing, my stomach dropping out and then impending vomit. My body reacts quick to bad food or poorly prepared seafood. And still I persist, I keep on and I continue...People say don't eat this and don't eat that. Fuck that - I'm human and even if I don't want to eat it, it's my duty to try it - i gotta stretch my palate. If you cook the life out of something to avoid potential harm - don't you also kill most of it's flavor...If something is processed and over processed doesn't that kill it's personality. I know when I get that pastry gig in the somewhere I'll prepare it the american way...but in homage to le cordon bleu I will learn the french standard -- it's only proper.
Don't tell anyone - but i like the taste of cream better than meringue.

School is hard,distance is shortening and I have the support of our REAL time friends...which is some good shit - coz I am showered with blessings and very little hate. And for those that hate - i pity your little spirits. and i'm sorry your hearts are dull - but it ain't my fault.

Been workin on a painting. Thank Buddha the nights are cold and it will set soon enough...On time even. I love realtime. I love being with someone that encourages my madness. My old lives are so far away...even if i hear glimmers of bullshit, I don't take the bait, coz my happiness won't be tainted yanno.

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